So! The safari.
As some of you all know, I've wanted to go on a safari for like, ever. I think it's one of those things where I was jealous of my grandparents being cooler than me and having pictures of lions humping, so I had to catch up.
Here's the general summary of my 3 days:
Total Hours on a Plane: 4
Total Hours on a Bus to and from Kruger: 10
Total Hours on Game Drives: 16
Total Number of the Big 5 Seen: 5
Time it took to See all 5: 3 hours (so I guess I really could have done the 1-day safari. Huh. I'm assuming I was just incredibly lucky.)
My Favorite Animal: HIPPOS. They waddle so waddlingly.
Animal My Car Saw that No One Else on the Trip Did: Hyena
Cast of the Lion King Accounted for: Everyone but the racistly black lion with a British accent.
Number of Times the Animals Burst into Song: None. WTF.
My Favorite Moment: When a freaking LION emerged from the brush and began to roar because he couldn't find his lionesses. He walked along with our car for a full minute, roaring and grunting morosely all the while. And I got it all on tape. I'm going to put it on Youtube and call it, "A Depressed Lion". He was totally 8 feet away from me. Our guide got shivers.
Funniest Moment: We walked in on two baboons humping. The female baboon did not approve of the male baboon's advances and shrugged him off of her. The male was depressed. Luckily he had a baboon harem, so he went over to one of the other ladies and proceeded to get the massage of a lifetime. The look in his eyes as that lady baboon picked ticks out of his back was reminiscent of me eating Wild Ginger's pad thai woon sen after three months on Iowa dorm food. Confused? Don't worry, I have pictures.
Worst Moment: Throwing up my malaria med...again.
Rating of the People in my Safari Car: F*** them. No, like seriously. They were utter dicks to me. You know the types of people who make friends and suddenly decide they don't need to get to know anyone anymore ever because they already have friends? They were those people. Like, they legitimately ignored me when I tried to talk to them. I was left making friends with the one guy no one else wanted to talk to because we was an annoying diva. That did not help my image amongst the group. It was like being in high school all over again.
Accomodations: CUTE! I stayed in a little bungalow that on the outside was reminiscent of my hut in Tagorme, but on the inside was filled with modern Western accomodations. Unfortunately the outlets were South African and I left my adapter on the ship, so my camera ran out of batteries on Day 2. I had to borrow diva boy's spare camera, further cementing me in the group as the girl who was friends with the diva who therefore we shouldn't talk to even though we weren't going to already because we already know each other and hate everyone else. Sorry, did I just rant there? I guess I did.
Food: We got breakfast at 10am and dinner at 8pm. The in-between was an epic struggle for survival. I enjoyed the challange. Also, one time a monkey dropped from the ceiling and stole our jelly. Why do monkeys keep invading my space?
Drink of Choice: South African Semi-Sweet White Wine. Mmmmmm...
Biggest Let-Down: Didn't see the wild dogs. :(
Cutest Thing Ever: Giraffes wrestling. Try to imagine it. I'll tell you if you got it right later. Also, baby elephants. Olivia, the word "heffalump" popped into my head on multiple occasions.
Overall Rating: I wanted a safari, I got a safari. It was just that: a safari. I saw almost all the animals we could see, and even had a few out-of-this-world moments. I also had long periods of seeing nothing. That's fine. That's how a safari is supposed to go. And I paid 50% of what the SAS trip cost, so awesome for me! Still, there's a little part of me that feels unimpressed. I don't think it's because of the safari itself, because it was about as good as it could have been. I just think it was one of those things where I had built it up in my mind for so long, it was never going to be as good as it was in my imagination. I guess for something costing me a grand, the stingy part of me was aiming for a leopard to jump into my lap and give me its cub. But I'm glad I did it, and I'd like to do it again sometime. I'd also highly recommend the experience to other people! Hopefully next time I'll have better people with me, as they definitely put a damper on my whole experience. I think I want to go to Uganda or Rwanda for my next one to see gorillas!
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